Javajune's Blog

Someone once said… “Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long as you live.”

My Secret Valentine

g-n-secret LOve        Love         LOve

         and more Love               Kiss                             Cupid

hugs and kisses                                Secrets                    So Cute

            Be mine                  My BFF                         I Love You

Don’t worry I’m not delusional I know it’s not Valentine’s Day but I could go for some chocolate right about now. This post is an invitation for you to post a secret valentine for that special someone. It can be your lover, someone you secretly admire, your child, your pet or favorite movie star. It could be anyone and you can post it anonymously or with full disclosure.  You decide but remember this could be an excellent way to score some brownie points. Ohhh brownies sound so good right now. No comments-I have a chocolate thing going on.

So if you’re feeling your inner cupid go to the Secret Valentine page and leave your message. Yes I made a special page just for you. If you prefer privacy you can send your Valentine to my email sofadiary@yahoo.com  I will post a few letters on the main page on or around Valentines Day. So start conspiring with cupid and write those love letters. If we have a good response I may make it a contest with a real prize. The Sofa Diary readers will be the judges. It’s up to you whether you want your message entered in the contest. Tell me your thoughts on this.

jj

January 30, 2009 Posted by | lovers, me, secrets | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Juicy Secrets

juicy-swim-suitHello sofa friends are you stir crazy, cabin feverish or just plain sick of winter yet? Silly question! I am so ready for a spring trip that I have been pulling out my beach wear which reminded me of a funny story. So I thought I’d share.

Last year I bought a really cute  Juicy Couture swim suit. While I was strutting along  the beach, feeling really hip, I over heard a man say to his wife, “Can you believe she has juicy written on her ass?” His wife said, “conceited bitch.” Now it never occurred to me that there were people who were totally clueless about Juicy Couture. (I know I am sometimes blissfully unaware but I like it that way) They probably live in a cave or next to a Kmart. Okay, that may sound a bit snarky but they started it.

For the rest of the trip I strutted around with a pair of shorts covering my juicy butt. Yes I succumed to peer pressure even though that suit was way too expensive to cover with a pair of cut-offs. This year I am searching for a really sexy but not too sexy suit, without a word about or on my ass. It is damn near impossible to find the perfect swim suit. Maybe I will run my choices by the Sofa Diary readers before making a purchase. I want to avoid another fashion faux pa and I know you all have the perfect fashion sense. 😉

jj

January 29, 2009 Posted by | confessions, me, rants, should be illegal | , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Don’t Steal My Thunder

Please welcome Betty Lou to the sofa.

Do you know what its like to an original? I’m sure you don’t. Do have ideas or inspirations of your own? I think I know the answer to that. Get your own life and definitely stay in your own lane. I’m tired of you following my lead, hopping on whatever train I’m riding, trying to top my best game.  I’m not your hero. It’s over I’m calling your bluff, so mind your own life and definitely get your own show. This life is already spoken for.

Junie: Very well put. This should be a song.  Maybe it already is.

jj

January 28, 2009 Posted by | rants, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Rant Until Your Hearts Content

Dear Sofa Diary readers,

It has come to my attention that some of you don’t have secrets to share but you do have a lot to say (rant) .  So I would like to invite those of you who are pissed off, fed up or just like to complain, to let us in on what is keeping you up at night or is just plain driving you nuts. With all that said I have a little something that I would like to get off my chest. So here goes Junie with our very first rant.

Okay, I am a modern girl. I use all of the latest technology, cellphones, computers, email, digital camera and this blog but I still know how to talk to someone without the latest gadgets. Why is it that so many of our family and friends can’t  pick up the phone or deliver really important news in person. Do you really think it’s appropraite to email or text message the news that someone is dying? Or email me the night before your Christmas party to let me know what you need me to bring. I may not look at my email before I leave and I really don’t want to find out that someone is dying via email or text message. Would it really kill you to pick up the phone and call me or better yet deliver that kind of news in person?

What do you all think.  Has modern technology gone too far? Have we all forgotten how to comunicate with one another? Does this drive anyone else crazy or is it just me? Tell me what drives you over the edge.

JJ

January 27, 2009 Posted by | family woes, Hello Miss Manners, me, rants | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

My Mother-in Law is the Devil

Please welcome Shirley to the sofa.

Well that’s it. This time she has gone too far. I have to expose her but I’m not sure how I should do it. My mother-in law is a manipulative bitch and I can’t take it anymore. It started with the wedding, she made sure she was in every picture and made me step out to have a family picture done. She comes by the house while I’m at work to help out, as she calls it. She does my husbands laundry not mine just his, irons his shirts and leaves him little notes and presents in his sock drawer. 

I have put up with her for 2 years now but her last action was just too much. She recorded an argument that my husband and I had on Christmas day. This was an argument that started due to some critical comments she made about me. She hide a tape recorder in the guest bedroom before we arrived that day and now she is using that tape to turn the rest of the family against me.  Isn’t that psycho? This has got to stop but I’m not sure how to do it because my husband doesn’t see her for who she really is- the devil.

Junie: Wow what an evil ****   I guess you could start by saying you know that he loves his mom but you need a little support and tell him the things she’s done to offend you. Tell him that he needs to stand up for you before she’ll make any changes. Good luck with this one.

jj

January 27, 2009 Posted by | family woes, Hello Miss Manners | , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Dear Sandra

Please welcome Callie to the sofa.

It’s been over thirty years since our childhood fun but I still remember. We were as different as two friends could be, me in a tiny immature body that still mirrored a girl of a much lesser age and you with your grown-up curves and advanced maturity. We were close friends but you were a much better friend than I. After all of these years I am still reminded, no haunted, by my lack of compassion which perpetuated the down-fall of our friendship. Your mind and body matured more quickly than mine and I was unable to understand your struggles as a nine year old girl in a woman’s body. I remember the day your bra came undone and you needed a friend to accompany you to the girls room and give you a hand. I was mortified at the thought of being seen going into a single stalled restroom to help a friend with her bra. I had no idea what it would be like to wear a bra, let alone have a malfunction in the middle of class. I gave you an awful excuse of not wanting to ruin my reputation. I can still see the look on your face with your arms locked across your chest. I heard the boys taunt you even though I pretended not to notice. This changed our friendship forever and  it wasn’t long after that incident that you and your family moved away.  As I grew older I began to better understand  how you must have felt.  It seems silly that an insincere act from so many years ago still ways heavy on my mind but it does. I think it’s because I felt the weight of your hurt and saw the disappointment in your eyes. It certainly left a mass of guilt on me for the past thirty years.  I often wonder how this breach of friendship impacted your life, if at all. It’s funny the things that make the biggest impressions and force us to remember the past.

Junie: How sad but sweet of you to harbor this guilt for so many years. My guess is that this has impacted you much more than your friend. She may not even remember. I think it’s time to let go and forgive that little nine year old girl.

jj

January 25, 2009 Posted by | confessions, Hello Miss Manners | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

What do you really want?

img_0160_1-2Hey friends and Sofa Diary readers I’m back from my Laws of Attraction workshop. I not only survived but I loved it. I sat in  the presence of people from all walks of life, who had come together to make a positive change in their lives.  Most were in transition (unemployed or looking for a significant change in their life) but all came with an open mind and positive spirit. The energy was contagious and the vibe irresistible.  I wasn’t hit up for money (the seminar was paid for) and nobody drug me off to a secret cult location. Sigh of relief.

So what the heck did happen? We studied the ways that positive thoughts and feelings can impact our life for the better. We explored  the answers to the question of what we want to acheive. The question was “what do you want in your life?” Is it prosperity? (yes please).    Love through solid relationships (you bet).    Or is it a long life of health and happiness? (of course).    Perhaps you’re just looking for success and a whole lot of money to come your way. (give me some of that).  Go here to see what I’m looking for.

What ever transaction you want in of your life you can make it happen with positive vibes (thoughts and feelings). What you send out is exactly what the universe responds with. Now that doesn’t mean you can sit on the sofa all day, think positive thoughts  and expect to receive. You will have to take positive actions as well. Do I believe it? I think I do for the most part. Providing my expectations are realistic. Does it hurt to try? Absolutely not. It does force us to take responsibility for our own happiness. No more blaming others. Try this to see exactly what your mind is capable of.

If I were to ask you the question: what do you want? What would your answer be? Come on don’t be afraid to ask the universe , just put it out there and see what happens. Sometimes dreams really do come true. Yes I honestly believe that. So, now that I’m asking, tell me: what do you really want?

I wanted to leave you with My Muse.

jj

January 25, 2009 Posted by | me, secrets | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Dear Lone Ranger

Please welcome Cat to the sofa.

Dear Lone Ranger,

I can feel you by my side, in my heart and all over my mind. I can hear you through the silence and smell you in my sleep. I know you like I know myself but sometimes I forget that we are not one. You have been there for so long attached to my every move, my every thought. I never considered life with or without you. I didn’t have to think of you at all because you were me and I was you. I took advantage of our closeness, our unique and unshakable bound. Sometimes I forgot to notice and just drug you along at my side.  I never doubted your unwavering support or unmistakable love but I didn’t acknowledge it either. Our first kiss left me quivering.

You grew tired of feeling alone, unnoticed and under appreciated. Now I can’t feel you or even smell you but I can see you with another and it’s killing me. We were meant to be together and I can’t function apart from you. If you come back to me I promise that this time I will not only feel you and drag you along side but really see you for all that you have given to my life.  Don’t leave me now that I know who you really are.

with love ,

Cat Woman

Junie: A  beautifully put love letter Cat Woman; I sure hope the Lone Ranger is reading this.

January 23, 2009 Posted by | confessions, lovers | , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

I May Be Joining a Cult

Junie takes a deep breath and stretches out on her sofa, The Velvet Lady, to let you in on a little secret. I have a confession to make and thought I would do it today in case you never hear from me again.

I have decided to attend a seminar this weekend and I’m a little nervous about it. The premise for this workshop is based on the movie The secret.  I saw an add for it one day after the Oprah show. Oprah and many other Hollywood celebs are into the teachings from the secret. The secret is really just the principles from “The Laws of Attraction” which states that the thoughts you put out as energy attract those very things back  into your life. Many people who follow The Laws of Attraction use vision boards and other things to help them. I already have a vision board and follow some of  the basic principles.

vision-board

But I’m a little nervous about going to this workshop and amercing myself into this concept. I am kind of easy and that scares me- a lot. I’m a bit of a free-spirit that doesn’t always look both ways before she cross the street.  I don’t want to become part of a cult or be brainwashed, even if this cult includes some very cool people like Oprah and Jenny McCarthy.img_0572-3 Don’t worry I’m not going to shave my head. The whole new-wave concept is kind of a hippie chick or gypsy girl kind of thing.  I am kind of a hippie,  maybe more like gypsy, sort of girl. Minus the whole pot-smoking nudity thing. I don’t need my head any further into the clouds than it already is and I get cold very easily.

Once again this crazy girl is trying something out of the ordinary and managed to talk a few people into going along. For some reason I have an easy time convincing people to follow me even after the many scary situations I’ve led them to, in the past. I am a little nervous about the workshop but I’m also very excited.  I’ve done my homework and I have my homemade journal (pictured above) all ready to take notes.  When I get back I’ll give you all a little update unless I’ve been reloacted to a desolate ranch out west or better yet some Hollywood mansion (at least they’d have internet access). If I make it back I will let you in on The Secret.   Below is a little youtube clip from the movie The Secret.

jj

January 23, 2009 Posted by | confessions, me | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Dear MR. President…

In honor of inauguration day I wanted to give my readers an opportunity to write an open letter or statement to the president expressing their wishes for a new beginning. Whether you helped elect Barack Obama into office or not, I want to hear what advice you have for our newly elected President. How can he keep the dream alive and heal a country that is on the brink of disaster.  Help President Obama help you.

jj

inaug-crowd

January 20, 2009 Posted by | me, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments