Javajune's Blog

Someone once said… “Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long as you live.”

Recalculating

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I told you it was beginning to look and feel like fall in my neck of the woods. See the mist that hangs in the air. This was taken last evening shortly before sunset. It’s brisk out this morning and requires a jacket. brrrrrr

You know that little voice that speaks up and changes the flow of your journey in mid-stream? No I’m not talking about the lady in your GPS system; I’m talking about that inner voice that says “hey your going the wrong way.” Do you know her? I have one of those but the trouble with my guide is that she frequently says “recalculating” but doesn’t explain where I’m supposed to be going or how I am to get there.

I’m on this creative journey and there are so many things I wanna do (like make a photo journal) and places I wanna go (like somewhere on the other side of the ocean) but there never seems to be enough time or money for any of it. I envision my life as this infinite thing with time and space for everything but I am a realist and know the reality of that dream. One of my goals is to live to be 100, so I can experience all the changes in society and yes, so I will have time to do everything imaginable. Life should be simple and one’s heart should be content with simple things but I’m just not that kind of girl.

My mind wanders, my curiosity leaps, as my heart yearns for more. What makes us simple or complicated and how can some be so content in the place they are standing, no matter how dull or insignificant it may seem? Perhaps their system isn’t equipped with that annoying little GPS-like voice that says “recalculating” every time they take a wrong turn or deviate from the path.

My map is complicated and the roads don’t have names. There are so many destinations that I haven’t met, but intend to, in time. I’ve walked through fields of flowers and the sidewalks of Times Square, I’ve enjoyed the essence of sea-spray on my cheeks, and climbed mountains in Montana, I’ve swam the Great Lakes and sailed in a boat ten miles across the Atlantic ocean but I know there is so much more just waiting to be discovered. My guide sometimes speaks in a foreign language and I have to do my best to interpret her message. So far this journey has been worth every moment but where is it taking me? Maybe I don’t I need to know that answer. Perhaps I should close my eyes and enjoy the ride, with ups and downs that sometimes mimic the thrill of a roller-coaster? I could raise my arms and scream at every turn. I should ignore the voice that says “recalculating” and press on.

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I’m still trying to tame little Willow (I just don’t know when to give up). We’ve made a connection but she still won’t let me get close enough to touch her. I want to run my fingers through her fluffy coat in the worst way. Isn’t she beautiful?

(If you don’t have a GPS in your car and are totally confused with my post or the comparison I’m making, let me explain. Most GPS systems come with an audible voice that will say something like this,” in 300 yards/meters turn left on route 66″ and if you miss your turn, this voice suddenly interrupts with the word “recalculating.” She then sends you on a detour to regain your place on the intended path.)

Well, not only do I have  that voice as part of the GPS in my car I also have a similar voice that lives in my head and frequently tries to keep me on the right path. The problem is, I don’t know where she’s sending me and I’m not sure why I can’t make a few side trips here and there. Can anyone else relate?

Here’s a youtube video of the system that lives in my car (not my head).

She’s a little annoying, isn’t she?

Well, I’m off to get some editing done and pics listed in my shop. Didn’t I say I was going to do that yesterday?

Recalculating!

xo-jj

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August 6, 2009 Posted by | confessions, me, photography | , , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Mother nature’s spell and a deep sleep

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Deep sleep leads to a fuzzy head and misty eyes that take time to focus in the morning. The cool nights have forced me into a deep slumber lately. This has been a strange summer for sure. The days are pleasant, no beautiful, with temps in the seventies, sometimes eighties and nights that dip down in the fifties. The morning is thick with a heavy dew and milky mist over the pond that melts away inch by inch. The days are dry and breezy and the nights are cool and moist. It has felt much more like fall than summer. For some reason the change of season always forces me to sleep very deeply, kind of like an animal preparing for hibernation. My mind and body have been fooled by mother nature’s unusual temperament this summer. She has cast quite a spell and it’s making me sleepy. Although I prefer a warm, borderline hot, summer full of sunny days and sultry nights this one hasn’t been bad, just different.

I’m not sure what this departure from the norm has meant or what the Earth is trying to say but something is up, I can feel it. Maybe I’m just overly sensitive and read more into a situation that needs to be there but then maybe not. Perhaps this is just a way of diverting our attention away from the state of the economy.  I am one who doesn’t really pay attention to every detail, I don’t listen to a lot of news nor do I read the paper but I have an all knowing kind of six sense that is usually quite accurate. I feel things in the air and watch the animals and plants respond to the Earth and this year feels so different, maybe it’s just me, maybe it’s not.  The animals that usually keep to the woods in the summer have stayed close to the house and made themselves more visible than in the past five years we’ve lived here. I have to wonder what the coming winter will bring. I hope it will be unusually mild and short unlike this past winter that seemed to never end. For now I am going to enjoy the remainder of my summer, strange as it is.

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All this talk about mother nature reminded me of the other night around 11:00 pm when I walked out my front door and was greeted by a big fat racoon. He quickly grabbed onto a little flower pot and held it out like a beggar asking for money. I laughed and tried to shoo him away but he put down the pot and came closer. I wasn’t sure whether to back away or stand my ground. I started to get a little nervous when all of a sudden the feral Mamma cat I been feeding came to my rescue. She got between us, snarled and swiped her paw at his face. He turned and ran. That was two nights ago and I haven’t seen him since. I guess she does appreciate my hand-outs.  Animals are both strange and amazing sometimes.

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Well that’s quite enough rambling for one day. I have plenty of picture editing to do and my hair needs a make-over in the worst way.  Hey Deborah a week from today I will be flying over your house on my way to the coast-look up and wave.

Wishing you a dewey day filled with beautiful reflections.

xo-jj

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August 5, 2009 Posted by | me, photography, rants | , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

The secret garden of hidden truths

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Follow me to the secret garden

She came to this place as though it were by instinct. The pathway to this hidden place was lush and closed in around her as she approached the hedge. The old hedge of Crepe Myrtles stretched 30 feet or more along the hillside. When she stepped past it there was a heavy wrought iron gate that was now rusted and broken away from its hinges.  It was covered in thick vines weaving their way through every hole. Everything looked so intriguing through heavy iron and leafy vines. The gate made the garden more alluring and she heard it call her name. Temptation forced her to take a peek and she was rendered breathless at the sight. Someone had gone to a lot of trouble to hide this place it must be a secret worth keeping. It looked as if this garden had a mind of its own and was not willing to reveal its secret too easily. It resembled an old Gothic graveyard and a most unusual sight, like a time and place in another world. It was so close and hidden in a landscape of open beach dunes only a few feet away.  The garden was hauntingly beautiful but it was filled with a resonance of deep sorrow that radiated throughout the grounds.  Roses and honeysuckle vines grew wildly and the moon flowers were just beginning to open as the light began to fade. Night Jasmine saturated the air with a luring scent that said come closer. The graveyard garden was bordered by a rusty iron fence and each three foot section ended with a 7 foot pole. Hanging from each pole was a glowing garden lantern. The light that flickered as the lanterns swayed with the breeze dazzled her eyes. It bathed the garden with shimmering light and set it apart from the landscape that surrounded it. The plants seemed to respond to her arrival by growing taller and unleashing an intoxicating scent as she passed by.

Twilight, lovely flowers, and a lantern’s glow set this garden apart from the world. It was silent except for the sound of the breeze that whispered through the vines. The whispering silence made her feel on edge and uncomfortable standing in her own skin. Her heart raced as she felt every breath hot and damp coming from her lips. It seemed more like a dream; this place couldn’t be real. She looked to the center of the memorial garden and there was a beautiful angel standing seven feet tall with her wings gracefully opened wide. The base of the statue read, “Angel of Hope”.  Suddenly she got the feeling that she didn’t belong and was intruding on a private space but then she noticed something. The name on the little head stone at the base of the statue was familiar. It was in the middle of  tiny flowers and several other broken headstones. Rose vines had taken over and grew wildly in and out of the head stones and over the wrought iron fence. A honeysuckle vine was spewing a heavy scent into the atmosphere. If it weren’t for the stunning beauty of this place it would be almost unbearable. The emotion of this secret garden was overwhelming and she couldn’t help but be over-taken by the power of sadness that resonated. Her time in this secret garden was a walk that weaved its way through the lies of her life but she didn’t recognize the truth that was standing right before her.

It felt like a good day for story telling. This story is based on the time I went searching for my roots and found the truth in a beautiful garden/cemetery.

Enjoy this day and everyday!

xo-jj

August 4, 2009 Posted by | family woes, me, secrets | , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Looming

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Just as the skies sometimes tease of storms looming overhead the Pacific North West is taunting me to come closer. Lately I’ve had several interruptions that have made it difficult for me to concentrate on my work. The smell of the ocean wafts by and leads my mind to another place. As hard as I try to ignore the call this nagging feeling  just won’t go away. I’m dreaming of craggy coastlines and sandy beaches and I can almost feel the wash trickle between my toes. It’s driving me crazy!

In just over a week I’ll be flying out to Portland Oregon for a few days. This trip is packed with things to do, mostly business, but I can hear a voice that is getting louder with each passing day. It’s the call of the sea and she knows my name.

I’m drawn to the sound of waves crashing on the shore and the taste of salty droplets on my lips. The smell of the ocean and the sound of the surf always rejuvenate my soul.  I long to walk the coastline in my bare feet and feel the pebbly sand between my toes. The time I’ve spent along the Atlantic and the Gulf coasts have been the best of my days but I have never stepped foot on the Pacific coast. This voice keeps repeating the fact that I will be only 80 miles from the shore line and what a tragedy it would be if I came that far and didn’t fulfil my dream of walking along the pacific coast. Usually Mr. java is there to say no, we have too much to do, focus and forget about it, but this time he won’t be there. How will I resist the temptation? Who will be there to say no?

Well, to my surprise Mr. Java said go ahead rent a car and take a trip to the coast, while your there. What? you mean I won’t have to sneak off to the beach for the day and later while on the plane ride home concoct some long story of how I couldn’t help myself and that it was a moment of weakness that pulled me westward. 

My heart lept and my mind got all warm and fuzzy as I saw my self facing the surf with the wind blowing through my hair and for just a tiny moment I could hear the sound of waves crashing down on the shore.

 I can’t believe it I’m going to a place I have never been. Holy **** I’m going to the Pacific coast!

Photo courtesy of Surf-rider.org

xo-jj

August 3, 2009 Posted by | me, rants | , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments