Javajune's Blog

Someone once said… “Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long as you live.”

Impact and Impulse

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(Gazing ball on my porch, reflecting me and my front door- it felt right)

So i took this picture last night about an hour before sunset and it evoked a feeling in me. Well it was more like one of those questioning or pondering kind of things I do when I’m alone. The thing I was wondering about was this- what impacts you and I to do the things we do? Let me make this simple… what is it that makes you act on an impulse one day but play it safe the next? I am very impulsive most of the time, especially when shopping- definitely not a good thing these days.

 I get in a certain mood when everything just feels right and then watch out because I’m ready to try almost anything. But what is it that makes me feel this way? I think it’s sometimes the right music, a seducing scent like Jo Malone’s Pomagranite Noir– can’t get enough of that- or maybe vintage colors that are warm and just melt one into the other, trigers it.  Yeah, it’s that allure thing again.

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(Bougainvillea vine on my cottage deck)

I’m not sure what it is but I know the feeling when something  is just right at the moment and so I act on it. It doesn’t always look or feel the same a little later. But you know when something is right even if it’s only right for the moment. Well this is the story of my life. yes I live for the moment but I love it. My life is one big series of moments just strung together by a crazy thread. Everything doesn’t always fit so nice and neatly but that’s okay. I enjoy everyday some more than others. Everything doesn’t have to make sense, well at least I hope not because if it does then I clearly missed the boat a long time ago. I always have several kettles on to boil, or irons in the oven, so to speak. Sometimes I roll with one for a while and leave it in the dust and then try another for a while. It does get a bit confusing at times but loving what you do is what it’s all about. 

You may be wondering when I’m going to get to the point of this ramble but that’s just it- there is no point- just rambling.

The weather is changing and the birds are chirping- gotta love that- go out and enjoy it!

jj

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April 23, 2009 Posted by | me, rants, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

This May Be a Deal Breaker

Please welcome Deedra to the sofa.

The long hours, miserable co-workers and that ass of a boss are now dead to me. I couldn’t stand it any longer and had to find a way to escape the misery. My hubby wouldn’t understand, if I told him the truth about what really happened. He was shocked that I was let go because he knows that I’m conscientious and work very hard. I told him I was fired for one little mistake,  but the that’s just a lie. I felt compelled to lie because of our financial situation-not good. I hope he never finds out the truth, it could be a deal breaker.  The truth is that I wanted to get fired and made a series of mistakes while hoping it would negate  my permanent dismissal. All I feel now is relief from the every day torture of going to a job I hated with people that I had absolutely nothing in common with. I’m finally free and it feels good.

Junie: Misery in the work place is all too common and sometimes leads us to desperate measures.  It’s too bad you can’t share your feelings with your husband. I’m glad you’re free and hope you can find employment in this tough economy.

jj

January 5, 2009 Posted by | confessions, secrets | , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments