Javajune's Blog

Someone once said… “Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long as you live.”

Diary of the girl next door

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Dear Diary,

If you are white, are a girl, have a family and look pretty ordinary than you just might be considered the girl next door. I never really subscribed to that theory or most other stereo types initiated by the middle class. Growing up middle class in a small town I felt protected, a little ordinary maybe but still protected. I never worried about whether there would be food on the table, a warm bed to sleep in and I never thought about violence of any kind. I wasn’t allowed to watch R-rated movies (which are more like the PG movies of today) and anything labeled adult conversation was not spoken in front of the children, ever!  I was a country girl from the mid-west and knew very little about life outside small town America. It was implied that I would finish school, get married and raise a family, whether I had a career or not was up for grabs.  Things were pretty simple and quite ordinary back then. I was considered the girl next door. I knew a lot of girl next door types and some were quite ordinary like me but then there were others that were anything but ordinary.  They might have been considered the girl next door at first glance but if truth be told their membership would be revoked in a heart beat. But the world was a little more polite back then (I’m talking the late 70’s- early 80’s)  and we lived by the golden rule of don’t ask- don’t tell. I’m not so sure that’s a good rule, well it doesn’t really matter because that rule has changed. Kids are no longer sweet & innocent until they arrive at adulthood and you’ll be hard-pressed to find a sixteen year old kid that hasn’t seen at least one R-rated movie.

So what happened? Is it a good thing that the girl next door doesn’t  exist anymore. Are we any safer now that our kids know what the world is all about both good and bad? What they don’t know can be googled  in 30 seconds, anyway. Although, I believe it’s dangerous to be too naive, fear invokes limitations on people.  They used to say “what you don’t know can’t hurt you” but today there isn’t much we don’t know. That theory was completely bogus anyway.

Now that this middle class- girl next door approaches middle age she kind-of, sort-of misses her bubble of innocence but then she also wonders what would have been if that bubble had never existed in the first place.  What if I’d known then what I know now…

xo-jj

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October 14, 2009 Posted by | confessions, me, rants | , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

The real me isn’t quite as provocative as that other girl

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Get ready because I’m going to unravell a bit here.

I’m sure you’ve noticed that this space has changed. I must confess that this blog started out as some what of a fraud. I was searching for a new me, trying new things, and writing in a different genre or style. I have always been a writer and creative soul but I wasn’t getting anywhere, so I thought well maybe I should change my style.  Maybe I should be a little more provocative or edgy that will get some attention. I’m here to tell you that trying to be something you’re not just doesn’t work. It’s best to be authentic and stick with what comes natural.

So I’m putting out the notice that what you have seen as of late is the real me and you can expect more of the same. I will no longer be entertaining saucy confessions from the sofa and my romance novel is on hold. You can expect a dreamy girl with an optimistic attitude, maybe too optimistic at times.

I have always loved to write and I had an intense hobby in photography years ago. I gave up my hobby when I was trying to climb the corporate ladder (which wasn’t me either) and film cameras gave way to digital. I just couldn’t get into the whole digital manipulation thing. The quality and depth of my digital photographs just wasn’t there. Well, as you’ve probably noticed I have gone back to my love of looking at the world from behind the lens and I’m trying to embrace (learn) the whole photoshop thing. It’s not easy!

I decided that if I really want to make a go of anything my heart has to be in it and it has to a part of me. I feel so alive when I’m behind the camera, looking  at the world through a little hole. I took a walk around a neighborhood in the big city today(big compared to a population of 6000 in my town) with my ipod on and my camera in hand and it hit me. This is it- this is me! So here I am confessing to you that the girl you met when this blog first started no longer lives here.

I hope you will hang out and get to know the real me. She isn’t as edgy or provocative as that other girl but I think you’ll like her if you just give her a chance. I’m sure there will be more confessions and more of me to come out in the near future but this is it for now.

Have a wonderful weekend!

xo-jj

May 29, 2009 Posted by | confessions, me, photography, rants | , , , , , , | 10 Comments

A most provocative green goddess

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Today I’m celebrating the color green. It’s not the kind of green you see when you look at blades of grass seeping up between your toes as you walk across the yard. Nor is it the shade of green you see when you look up at the canopy the trees providing some respite from the heat of the afternoon sun. This green is quite different than what you’ll find in nature. It’s causes your eyes to stare and become fixated, it’s provocative, and almost takes your breath away. I love this green for it’s audacity to be bold despite the competition. I’m not implying that this green is any better the the lovely shades found in nature but it does make a statement.

IMG_4437When this shade is coupled with old wood and a rich patina, my heart beat faster with excitement. You may be thinking right about now: what a silly thing to get so excited about. Well, my reply to that would be- it is the little things that make every day special. Sometimes we are so busy living for those big moments that we miss the most extraordinary things that just slip by. A little pop of color here, a little taste of sweetness there can make an ordinary day pretty special. 

This year I made a vow to myself that I would not let the little things pass by without noticing their significance and celebrating their contributions toward making my day special. I won’t allow myself to get caught up in the big prize at the end and give up all the little gifts along the way. The big prize is never as grand as it seems anyway. In the past I’ve lived my life thinking if only I could get to that point in my life or I can’t wait until this happens, only to find that those moments never came or when they did they weren’t so grand after all.

With all of the difficulties we face in life everyday don’t we deserve little bouts of happiness sprinkled in. The answer is “yes” BTW.  Old doors make me happy, so I decided to share some of my happy moments captured  with you.

As I take a trip around the blogsphere I see so many struggling to get through the day. It makes me sad and I want to reach out and say it’s okay or did you notice anything special today? So here I am with this one little blog reaching out to all of you to say " don’t let the good stuff that’s sometimes over shadowed by the ugly stuff slip past you. That little moment when you sink your teeth into a chocolate bar or witness a flock of baby ducklings following their mom across the road maybe the best thing that happened to you on that day. Stop and take a moment to celebrate the way these little tiny blessings make you feel. It may sound silly but I think you’ll find it makes a difference in the way you feel at the end of the day.

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Oh how I would love to have this groovy green gate in my garden. It’s so yummy with little bits of rust peeking through it’s vibrant coat of paint. It reminded me of a big green goddess in the middle of the desert. I drooled over it but it doesn’t go with my earth-toned house and the price tag well lets not go there. I decided that this image would have to do. I can visit it anytime I need a little shot of groovy.

Yes it’s true I am an internal optimist and sometimes that gets annoying but hey what’s the alternative? I have a choice of how I see things and I’ve picked the door with the extraordinary shade of  chippy green paint because it makes me smile. 🙂

xo-jj

May 27, 2009 Posted by | me, photography | , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments