Shoplifting Queen

Please welcome Freebird to the sofa,

I don’t know when the stealing started but now I can’t stop. It is an incredible high for me to plot and plan and then actually pull it off. I wear loose clothing and slip small things into a girdle-like undergarment. It is pretty easy to get away with. I’ve had one close call, but I knew they were onto me, so I dumped everything when I was out of  view; when they searched me I was clean. This bad habit has become much worse lately. I feel as though I can justify my actions because of the economy crisis. I know it’s morally wrong and illegal, but guess who doesn’t have any credit card debt when the Holiday’s are over? Don’t lecture me it won’t help; I will just tune it out. I wish I felt remorse for my actions- sorry I don’t.

Junie: Okay I won’t lecture but you have to promise not to whine when you find your freebird booty not so free anymore. Jail-time is very likely in your future. Freebird could become a Jailbird-sorry I’m just saying……

jj

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